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1001 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married, by Monica Mendez Leahy
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The relationship expert from the Ladies' Home Journal, the Wall Street Journal, and Lifetime Television shows how to prevent marriage problems before they start
There's nothing wrong with starter jobs and starter homes, but starter marriages? Relationship expert Monica Mendez Leahy is on a mission to help readers make their marriage last. Her 1,001 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married offers a reality check for couples on the marriage path, helping them realize how much they have yet to discover about their partner's nature, thought processes, lifestyle, and marital expectations.
Engaged couples learn to discuss issues deeper than "chicken or fish" and to broach subjects that are often ignored before the nuptials yet essential for the foundation of an intimate, long-lasting relationship. Posed in a variety of fun formats, including multiple choice, fill-in-the-blank, and hypotheticals, these questions include topics such as:
Product details
Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: McGraw-Hill Education; 1 edition (April 16, 2004)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 9780071438032
ISBN-13: 978-0071438032
ASIN: 0071438033
Product Dimensions:
5.6 x 0.8 x 8.2 inches
Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.4 out of 5 stars
210 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#13,311 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
This book is an excellent resource for engaged couples/couples on the path to engagement in the near future.My boyfriend and I are planning to be engaged by spring, and we wanted to find a book to go through to get us covering all of the bases. We're not religious, and it was sort of difficult to find a marriage prep book that wasn't faith-based. This one seemed like a good fit, so I tried it out, and I'm so glad I did.It takes some of the usual topics -- like finances, children, religion, family dynamics etc -- but goes into great detail, thinking of hypothetical scenarios and requiring each person to name their expectations, intentions, desires going forward. My almost fiance and I have had very engaging conversations, and I feel more prepared for marriage as a result of this book. The questions tend to be time-consuming, so we typically only do one or two chapters at a time. 1001 questions, some requiring more thought and others more straightforward, is an awesome resource for couples looking to take the next step. I highly recommend it.
This book is FANTASTIC and I buy a copy for any friend who is thinking about getting engaged. Some folks complained this book has logical basic questions you should know about your spouse before agreeing to walk down the aisle - but that's exactly the point! I really do think far too many people getting married nowadays assume once they know the very basics (Do you want kids? Do you want to be rich? Will we share a bank account?) and they love the person, they're set! I think the "logical" things aren't all that common anymore and there is nothing to hurt in prepping yourself and your future spouse as much as possible beforehand - you WANT to stay together right? So take some time and go through this. My fiancé and I sat around, going through the questions together, a few day while lounging about after work - it's not hard and can even be fun. We knew far more than it seems many couples knew going into the book, but still found good topics to cover! And we've been happily married for six years.This book walks couples through a lot of the LOGICAL (sorry, no, they're not all fun and whimsy - but fun and whimsy doesn't build a marriage, those are the perks!), solid questions you should cover before committing your life to someone. Beyond having kids, it walks through what you might each do in a situation during their upbringing. On finances, you go from basics about banking to taxes to how to handle situations regarding layoffs and other woes. From defining each version of "cheating" (this really does vary person to person, oddly enough, as so many couples forget about lines coworkers may try to cross or emotional cheating), etc.If you can't sit down and go through this book with the person you plan to marry because you find it boring or the questions obsolete - frankly, you probably shouldn't be getting married. You'll only gain healthy insight and good, open discussions on any possible disagreements - no losses, here. And if you make it to the very end of the book and find that you gained nothing new and had already come to agreement on every single question posed, then be GLAD you were able to spend $10 to find out that you really DO know what you're in for.
We've had friends hit points in their relationships where they realize they're at an impasse with their partners about major issues (or seemingly minor points in them that become major) like finances, family, careers, or religion, and say that they wish they had talked about it before it became major. It seems so much more difficult to discuss these things once they become points of contention, and we hoped to try to avoid at least some of that by discussing what we can early on.We didn't go through every single question in this book – some we had already discussed, for example, and some didn't seem applicable to us – but the sheer variety and depth of the questions was wonderful. Though we'd already talked about a lot of the big ticket items, there were definitely things in here that we hadn't discussed, both in terms of details on those items and other topics we hadn't thought about. The questions also helped to clarify or solidify where we, as a couple (and in some cases as individuals), stand on certain topics, and we find ourselves still referencing what we discussed using the questions in this book when making decisions years later.Of course one book or set of conversations won't address every possible thing that could come up in the course of a lifetime, of course some impasses are going to be reached no matter how much you talk, and of course marriage involves an ongoing conversation, but something like this can help with the start.
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